Recap from Previous Parts:
In the previous parts of this blog series of my journey, I delved into the naive beginnings of a rough relationship, followed by the emotional rollercoaster that ensued. Today, I will pick up the pieces in the next part of this blog series…
Dark Days of Depression… 😭🫥😔
The echoes of our rough relationship continued to resound in my mind long after he had walked away. At this point, I didn’t even know if there was a ship to it, or if I was sailing alone.
Those emotions, once vivid and exhilarating, had now turned into a haunting melody that played relentlessly in the background. It was an unmelodious tune, an uproar of heartache and betrayal.
For the next two weeks, I descended into a dark abyss of depression. It was a period marked by heavy clouds that hung over my soul, obscuring any glimpse of light. Each day felt like a marathon, with the finish line slipping further away with every step.
Nights were the hardest. As the world outside slept, I lay awake, my mind a battleground of memories and regrets. Tears flowed freely, and the weight of loneliness settled in my chest, making it difficult to breathe. The silent room amplified the silence within me. I was in a dorm room and it was a midterm short break I decided not to go home as it felt pointless to me.
During those dark days, it felt as if I was adrift in a vast ocean, with no sight of land on the horizon. I questioned my worth, replaying every moment of our relationship in my head, searching for answers that always seemed to elude me. How had I let myself become entangled in this web of emotions? How had I not seen the signs earlier?
The world outside continued to spin, oblivious to my silent suffering. In my confinement, even able to listen to the echoes of doors clanging and winds sweeping across the trees, I felt alone in the world.
Suddenly, looking at the shut door opening, my friend Ria, came in and saw me swimming in the pool of my tears, Her emotions fell flat for me as she offered me well-intentioned advice, but her words were like distant echoes.
I felt like an actor in a play, performing my daily routines while wearing a mask that hid my inner turmoil. I pretended to be strong for a long time and finally, the outburst of emotions and tears flooded my eyes as she spoke and I was rewinding the tape of everything that went on in my relationship and what I did that was wrong, I felt so worthless.
Yet, in the depths of despair, a glimmer of resilience emerged. It was during those dark days that I turned to self-help books, seeking solace in their pages. Good and thoughtful friends became my lifeline, offering support and a shoulder to lean on. Sermons and passages from the Bible like this verse provided a flicker of hope.
I was reminded that I am still loved by God even in my darkest
I was reminded to take comfort in knowing that God is always there no matter the troubles I face and that he is the source of comfort.
Despite the weight of depression, I clung to these lifelines. They were the ropes that, helped me pull myself out of the abyss of depression. Slowly but surely, the clouds began to disperse, and the darkness reduced.
As I share these painful moments with you, dear reader, I leave you with a lingering question: What happens when the storm finally subsides, and the skies clear? What will I find on the other side of this harsh reality journey?
Join me in the next part of this series as I continue to navigate the maze of love, loss, and self-discovery. The path ahead remains uncertain, but I am determined to walk it with courage and curiosity.
Until next time…
[End of Part 3]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Want to know how the story ends? Watch out for part 4 and more😁, I hope you enjoyed this part.
Did you miss out on the first part of this blog series? Here is a recap of PART 1 and PART 2
Would you like to connect with me on other social media platforms? CLICK HERE
Are you yet to subscribe? Please do and be the first to be notified when I drop a new update.
Take care😊❤️
1 thought on “Part 3: Dark Days of Depression”