You know, I used to think leadership was all about standing at the front, looking put together in a blazer, with a clipboard and a strong LinkedIn headline.
You know — #BossEnergy kind of vibe. Until life, as usual, came with a plot twist.
Not long ago, I found myself leading this small group, nothing too serious, just something I was passionate about. And then I noticed something funny.
The people around me? They weren’t just following me. No no, they were literally mirroring me. Same tone, same fire, even some of my quirky phrases (I heard someone say “let’s stay soft but strategic,” and I almost passed out).
At first, I was flattered. Like, oh wow, influence much? But then it hit me:
If they’re reflecting me… what exactly am I reflecting?
In my reading on day, I came across this quote by John Maxwell which said,
“Leaders attract people like themselves. Who you are is who you attract.”
Yeah… that was a little rude, but also painfully true.
It made me pause and reflect.
Was I showing up as someone who inspired leadership, or just obedience?
Was I making room for growth, or micromanaging because I didn’t trust anyone to “do it like me”?
Because here’s the thing, true leaders don’t gather fans; they grow leaders. They spark something in others.
It’s not about being the smartest in the room, it’s about building the kind of room where others can grow into their smartest selves.
So I did a personal audit. Like a real one. And so far,
I’ve started leading more with vision, less with ego (hard, by the way).
I’ve learned to spot potential before people even knew they had it.
I’ve created safe spaces for others to try, fail, speak up, take over.
I stopped needing to be the only “star” in the sky and started creating constellations.
Because hey even history tells us that, even the greatest movements, civil rights, innovation, revival, reformation were never carried by one voice alone. It was always the few who dared to lead others who could lead, too.
So now, when I step into leadership, I ask myself one simple question:
“Would I follow me?”
And if the answer isn’t a full-body yes, then it’s time to grow.
Because the kind of leader you attract… is the kind of leader you already are.
So… what are you reflecting?
(PS: Yes, I’m still learning, but at least now, my mirror’s clearer…;)
