They didn’t stab me in the back
they smiled while doing it.
And that’s what hurt the most.
Not the betrayal itself,
but how long I called it love.
How long I stayed,
hoping they’d come around.
How many times I excused the sharp words,
the silent treatments,
the shade covered in fake concern.
“Even my close friend, someone I trusted, one who shared my bread, has turned against me.”— Psalm 41:9
I used to think forgiveness
meant access.
That to be “a good friend”
meant tolerating mistreatment,
swallowing pain,
and staying loyal
even when it was costing me peace.
But betrayal taught me something:
Unconditional love
does not mean unconditional tolerance.
So I started building boundaries.
Not walls—
just doors with locks.
Not out of hate—
but out of healing.
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”— Proverbs 4:23
Now, I choose my circle with prayer.
I don’t chase anyone.
I don’t beg to be chosen.
And I don’t keep people close
just because they’ve been around.
History is not the same as loyalty.
Familiarity isn’t friendship.
Time invested isn’t proof of love.
I’ve redefined what I expect:
→ Mutual effort
→ Respectful honesty
→ Safe silence
→ Celebrations that don’t come with envy
→ Correction that feels like care, not control
“Wounds from a friend can be trusted, than multiplies kisses from an enemy”— Proverbs 27:6
I want friendships
that feel like rest,
not emotional warfare.
I want friends
who see me without competition,
who show up without keeping score,
who listen without weaponizing my words.
So if you’ve ever been betrayed by a friend,
I pray you heal
into a person who loves boldly—
but protects wisely.
Because Jesus loved everyone…
but even He had boundaries.
You can forgive and still move on.
You can love and still choose distance.
You can be kind and still say, “Not anymore.”
From betrayal, I found clarity.
And now I walk in peace—
with no bitterness,
but with hopeful better expectations.
…
Xo 💋
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