A Test of Patience…

Yesterday was a day that tested my patience, my faith, and my resilience.

For weeks, I’ve been struggling to pin down a clear direction for my thesis, and it’s been weighing heavily on me.

The symptoms I’ve been experiencing feel like a mixture of stress and depression, though I can’t quite figure out what exactly is going on.

The frustration has been building, and it all came to a head yesterday.

With writer’s block clouding my mind and preventing me from making any progress, I decided to change my environment.

I’ve often heard that sometimes a fresh setting can spark creativity, so I booked a train ticket to Wolverhampton City Council Library, hoping that a change of scenery would help.

Up until now, I’d been doing all my research at the University of Wolverhampton library, but this time, I needed something different.

When I arrived, I discovered something I hadn’t known before you need to become a member to use the library’s full services. I had assumed you could just walk in and start working, but after a quick enrollment process, I became an official member.

I felt a small sense of accomplishment just by completing that simple task. It was a reminder that sometimes, you have to start small and take one step at a time.

Once I got settled, I headed upstairs to the computer area, asking the staff if I could use one of their systems.

They told me that as a member, I could use the computer for free for two hours, which was more than enough time to focus on my thesis. I sat down, logged in, and spent those two hours searching for inspiration.

But nothing was coming. The more I searched, the more drained I felt. I kept overthinking every possible idea, doubting myself, and feeling like I was at a dead end.

The pressure to get started on my thesis was crushing, and the more I tried to force a solution, the more elusive it seemed. I kept asking myself, “What if I never find the right topic? What if I’m just not cut out for this?”

Eventually, I had to pause. I sat back, closed my eyes, and took a deep breath. In that quiet moment, I prayed. I asked God for guidance, for clarity, and for the strength to keep going despite the overwhelming stress.

It wasn’t a long prayer, but it was heartfelt. I’ve always believed that God has a way of coming through when we least expect it, and yesterday was no exception.

Right as I was about to give up, something clicked. Out of nowhere, an idea surfaced, and suddenly, everything started to make sense. It wasn’t the most groundbreaking revelation, but it was a start.

I found a topic that felt right, something I could work with, and I knew deep down that this was the breakthrough I had been waiting for. It wasn’t a flashy moment; there were no fireworks, but it was enough to give me hope and keep me moving forward.

By the time I wrapped up at the library, I realized I had spent almost the entire day there. I had arrived around 8:30 in the morning and didn’t leave until after 6 in the evening.

The time had flown by, and although I hadn’t made as much progress as I had hoped, I had something tangible to work with a starting point. And in that moment, that was enough for me.

Looking back, there are a few important lessons I’ve learned from this experience.

First, it’s okay to feel overwhelmed and uncertain. We all go through seasons where nothing seems to make sense, and that’s normal.

The key is to keep going, even when the road ahead is unclear. Sometimes, you need to change your environment, take a break, or simply breathe to gain a fresh perspective.

Second, I’ve learned that faith plays a crucial role in pushing through difficult times. Even when I felt like giving up, I knew that God had a plan for me. His thoughts toward me are good, and they’re designed to give me hope and a future.

It’s easy to forget that in the middle of chaos, but yesterday was a powerful reminder that trusting God, even in the smallest of things, can lead to breakthroughs.

Lastly, I’ve realized that progress doesn’t always come in leaps and bounds. Sometimes, it’s slow and gradual, and that’s okay. The important thing is to keep moving, to keep trying, and to believe that things will work out, even if they don’t seem to be in the moment.

So, if you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or on the verge of giving up, remember this: there’s always a way forward. It might not be obvious at first, and you might have to try a few different paths before finding the right one.

But in the end, you’ll get there. Just take it one step at a time, trust the process, and keep faith that God is guiding you, even when you can’t see it.

Thank you for reading my story. I hope it encourages you to keep pushing through whatever challenges you’re facing.

Don’t forget to subscribe to my blog for more updates, and as always, trust that everything will be absolutely fine.